{"id":1484,"date":"2015-12-14T19:28:30","date_gmt":"2015-12-14T19:28:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/v2.markerly.com\/blog\/?p=1484"},"modified":"2015-12-14T19:28:30","modified_gmt":"2015-12-14T19:28:30","slug":"are-you-suffering-from-goldilocks-syndrome","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/are-you-suffering-from-goldilocks-syndrome\/","title":{"rendered":"Are You Suffering From Goldilocks Syndrome?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Reading Time: <\/span> 3<\/span> minutes<\/span><\/span>This post originally appeared in Forbes<\/a>, written by Markerly co-founder, Sarah Ware.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"Markerly

Markerly co-founder says she loves her dog “just right”.<\/p><\/div>\n

Women in startup-land face a catch-22 that I like to call \u201cGoldilocks Syndrome.\u201d It goes like this: As a woman, you\u2019re never going to get to the top if you\u2019re too busy wondering whether or not your porridge is too hot or too cold. Yet, no matter how high you get, you\u2019ll never run out of people happy to take its temperature for you.<\/p>\n

Despite the cute name, Goldilocks Syndrome is very real, and it\u2019s one of the biggest disadvantages that women face in business today. There are more resources available to women in business than ever before, like female-centric coding schools, accelerators and events, but none of them change the fundamental issue, which is how unfairly women are judged.<\/p>\n

Even if we have the confidence to know when our porridge is \u201cjust right,\u201d what we feel \u2013 and exhibit \u2013 is not always how others perceive us. This emotional dissonance can put women behind with fundraising, business deals, networking and other opportunities.<\/p>\n

Here are five of the most common triggers of Goldilocks Syndrome that I\u2019ve seen this past year, and what to do when you find yourself confronted by them:<\/div>\n

 <\/p>\n

#1: Attitude<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \n
  • Too hot: Some might assume that if you have a child you won\u2019t be able to do your job as well.<\/li>\n
  • Too cold: If you don\u2019t have a child, you\u2019re criticized for not being maternal enough.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

    Tip<\/strong>: It\u2019s okay to be competitive. It\u2019s lonely at the top, and you can\u2019t please everyone. If you are more of a thinker, play up that asset. Challenge others with your intelligence by sharing your thoughts and thoroughly analyzing different scenarios.<\/p>\n

     <\/p>\n

    #2: Emotion<\/strong><\/p>\n

      \n
    • Too hot: Showing sensitivity puts you at risk for being labeled \u201cemotional.”<\/li>\n
    • Too cold: If you don\u2019t show your feelings at all, you\u2019re at risk for being labeled \u201cheartless.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

      Tip<\/strong>: If empathy is part of who you are, embrace it and use it to your advantage. Clients and employees will appreciate feeling heard and enjoy your attention to detail. If you\u2019re more closed off professionally, own that too. So what if people are scared of you? Above all, don\u2019t second-guess yourself.<\/p>\n

       <\/p>\n

      #3: Motherhood<\/strong><\/p>\n

        \n
      • Too hot: Some might assume that if you have a child you won\u2019t be able to do your job as well.<\/li>\n
      • Too cold: If you don\u2019t have a child, you\u2019re criticized for not being maternal enough.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

        Tip<\/strong>: When was the last time a man got judged for having \u2014 or not having \u2014 children? Never. Anyone who thinks that you will not be able to do your job as well if you have a child is sexist, plain and simple. Your personal choices are not an acceptable topic of work-related conversation \u2014 and you are allowed to make that clear.<\/p>\n

         <\/p>\n

        #4:<\/strong>\u00a0Speaking Out<\/strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

          \n
        • Too hot:\u00a0Some people say that talking about the problems women face in business is just their way of making excuses, and that women should stop complaining.<\/li>\n
        • Too cold: On the other hand, avoiding the topic entirely can earn ire from women and men who\u00a0do<\/em>\u00a0talk about the problem.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

          Tip<\/strong>: Yes, women can do\u00a0anything<\/em>, but the truth is that it\u2019s just a little bit harder. Some people won\u2019t like that I wrote this article \u2014 and that\u2019s okay. If everyone was always satisfied and agreed on everything, then this world would be a pretty boring place \u2014 and startups probably wouldn\u2019t exist. Besides, since I\u2019m a woman, I know I\u2019m right anyway. (Kidding!)<\/p>\n

           <\/p>\n

          #5: Having an Opinion<\/strong><\/p>\n

            \n
          • Stop right here. It isn\u2019t you. It\u2019s them. Actually, scratch that,\u00a0it\u2019s all of us.<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

            Tip<\/strong>: One of the first things you\u2019ll learn in startup-land is that people are very opinionated. When I say very, I mean it! In particular, people say things on social media that they would never say to your face, and that can feel intimidating at first. Don\u2019t worry, you\u2019ll get used to it. For every naysayer in startup-land, there\u2019s another awesome individual that\u2019s eager to help out. It balances out \u2014 trust me.\u00a0After all, we\u2019re all here because we\u2019re so opinionated we decided we should just start our own companies.<\/p>\n

            All in all, the double-standard won\u2019t disappear overnight. My hope is that we all think twice about how we treat others, so that we can work towards curing Goldilocks Syndrome for future generations of female entrepreneurs together.<\/p>\n

            Now, about those bears\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

            Reading Time: <\/span> 3<\/span> minutes<\/span><\/span> This post originally appeared in Forbes, written by Markerly co-founder, Sarah Ware. Women in startup-land face a catch-22 that I like to call \u201cGoldilocks Syndrome.\u201d It goes like this: As a woman, you\u2019re never going to get to the top if you\u2019re too busy wondering whether or not your porridge is too hot or too…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1496,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1484"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1484"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1484\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1496"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1484"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1484"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/staging.markerly.com\/pulse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1484"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}